Thoughts.

Just as crazy as it is to suddenly be a Neo--Futurist,

That's how crazy it is to suddenly not be a Neo--Futurist.

I know I'm always a Neo--Futurist.

Just like I'm always a cherub.

Except this isn't a summer program at all.

Its different. Its different because the audition process is so rigorous. And the start date is so riveting. And then you stay as long as you want. I've seen two years, I've seen 18 years. Its up to you. Its not like a contract is negotiated every fiscal fuck up. When you kind of want to move on, you just say something. You just put in your last six months, and that's that.  I've seen this before with other alums. Its goes like this; machine, machine, machine, machine, machine, machine, machine, get off the conveyor belt. Bye. See you at film fest. Have fun purchasing your condominium.

I don't know of any Neo--Futurists on their death beds. We haven't gotten there yet I guess. Someone who was 25 in 1987 probably still has a lot of years left. Well, I think one guy died of aids. But, nobody liked him, right? He was the dude who stole a bunch of money out of the rolling banks, right?

Good lord, what will they say about me?

But, I think my point is that, on your death bed, those years spent creating performance art above a funeral home, those are the best years of your life. Right? Has to be, right? Give me a break?

The people. The community. It hurts.

There's so many, I don't have a scarecrow, all of them most of all.

I guess someday you raise children, and that they say is amazing. And BORING! Gawd, another child hungry poverty stricken sensitive heterosexual female artist with a bad childhood bites the dust! Puts her ovaries on the period tracker and ruins everybodys good time! Meanwhile there's a homeless youth epidemic!

Oh, I know, but those wicker park onesies are so cute dangling from those graffiti stained windows next to yogurt boutiques, tattoo parlors, and taco deconstructions. How could you not want a baby with a Mohawk?






Its came up already, "my background." Its came up already in these initial meets and greets. They know. Its hard to talk about. I wanted a clean start, I think. I like things to be even Steven.

But, I'm always a Neo--Futurist.

Lucky,
Skin & Toast